hoopdeedoo: knit

Showing posts with label knit. Show all posts

Monday, July 19, 2010

Our Final Exhibit for Craft Fail Week: The Sasquatch Toe Socks

Sorry it's taken me 6 months to come clean. I tried. I really did. I know your hubby really wanted these toe socks. Thanks for being so kind as to supply the yarn and the pattern, and for your confidence in me.

It's a very good pattern. That's not the problem.

I'm not sure the lady at the yarn store gave you good advice on this yarn. It's lovely yarn. But it's DK weight (or so it says) tweed, with no stretch at all, like the Cascade Fixation recommended. It's also very scratchy. I pulled out a significant amount of "VM" while knitting. "VM" is knitter code for "vegetable matter"which is code for "bits of grass and crap" that gets into wool while it's still on the sheep. Or at least that's one of the things I picked up from listening to some people talking about spinning.

I also had a little problem with gauge. I had to go down to size 1's to get stitch gauge (but never got row gauge). Not sure this DK-esque yarn liked being on size 1's. It was kind of like knitting a brillo pad.

But they still turned out too big. I say "they" but I should say "it", because after I finished the first sock my hubby tried it on and we both laughed until we cried. So I only got as far as to make a few toes of the second sock. I just didn't have enough optimism for that.

And I had to break into the second ball of yarn already to finish the first sock, so I don't think there's enough yarn anyways.

I'm really sorry.

In the end, it's probably a good thing I completely crashed and burned on this project. Otherwise, you would have ended up with scratchy sasquatch socks that you felt obligated to pay for and your hubby felt obligated to wear. Then he'd get some kind of itchy mysterious rash between his toes and you'd have to take him to a specialist who would charge you some ridiculous amount to explain to you that his in-between toe skin is just sensitive to sheep crud and sticks.

Would you like for me to frog it for you, or would you like the pleasure yourself?

Thanks for having such an awesome sense of humor about the whole thing.

Love,

Amy

P.S. I'll give you a discount on that apron because I feel really guilty about the whole thing. ;)

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Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Epic Craft Fail Week: The Apple Green Shrug

Welcome to Exhibit A: "The Apple Green Shrug." I happen to really like this color, that's not the problem.

Let me state, for the record, that most of these craft failures are not due to pattern flaws. This is a lovely pattern, the One Skein Wonder by Stephanie Japel, whom I fervently admire. It's a fabulous little knit, great for a leftover yarn or something expensive. But I digress. This is about my disasters.

The most important reason that this project failed is:

I knit it while in the hospital after having my second C-section.

I was on lots of meds and it was pretty dark in there and I was sleep deprived. Not great conditions for successful knitting, although it turned out to be pretty successful as far as the kid was concerned!

Other than that, my most notable errors were:

Choosing a yarn with absolutely no bounce back or memory. This is Classic Elite Bam Boo, which has GORGEOUS drape, but doesn't lend itself to ribbing. Note the sagging in the first photo. This yarn would be better suited to a scarf or flowy top, but it can get quite heavy. A better choice for this project would be a wool blend or even something with a bit of stretch to help it out around the armholes.
Choosing a yarn with too many plies. This is only a problem because I was a very new knitter at the time, working in the dark, using pointy needles. Plies split. You can see a lot of them that went unknit in the photo below.
And last, but certainly not least, I was still a new enough knitter that I didn't know that I was twisting all of my knit stitches by knitting them through the back, and that it's a no-no.

You'd think that I would have stopped mid-way, what with all of these troubles with plies and sagging. But noooooo, I finished the whole thing. Guess I was hoping it would look ok in the end (like I said, I was on a lot of drugs). Alas, it does not. But the kids have appropriated it for dress-up, so at least it's not a waste entirely.

The kiddo turned out ok, though!!